Saturday, 31 May 2014

When I became a real bloke in love

When I became a man, a real bloke in love, I learnt how to appreciate a lady, put away all the childish, selfish and hard on feelings I had for women. But before I became a man, I didn't know how to fit the shoes of a king.

I was a child trying to find his way, and the toys I played with kept my eyes occupied and left my mind in a lustful boyish frenzy and my playmates had long legs short skirts and soft skin and they cared to lay down and wallow with me often, erotic women turned out to my very best friend

Before I became a man, I saw how God made man from dust so likewise I made love from lust, I didn't know any better, I was taught by example, let your tongue speak games but never let your heart speak much,  I let myself walk over women with no regret nor shame. 

I treated every woman around me like beauty pageant contestants with zero returns in their stashes; mind you this was before I became a man, a real man who finally realized the value of true love.

This was about that time I took notes from a father figure who really didn't know how to be a father go-figure. 

About that time when mom was a punching bag because he was too afraid to take his frustration out on the world instead by simply enduring affliction yet during addiction he could go 12 rounds amidst the most violent screams of stop… stop…

I would stand in plain sight hoping that daddy sees me for mammy didn't deserve what she got just because she didn't satisfy his needs. 

Before I became a man in love, I allowed anger to set up an erection site inside and bitterness never rested it left no time wasted and whether anyone loved me or not all I could regard to take was hatred, I became allergic to showing any form of empathy.

When I became a man I learnt how to love a lady right back because am not ashamed of my feelings neither would my fears soften the creak in my spirit even though am good at falling short of my promises. I discovered that there are medicinal qualities down the corridors of meditation.

When I became a man I learnt how to love her for her, I learnt to honour her like she was God for one day she would be pregnant with the seed that would convert my bequest so that both my name and success would have permanence.

I could not love her before because my anxieties and fussiness left me looking at the next best player checking in at the scoring table. How could I possibly be her covering as a canopy with holes in it?

When I became a man, a real man in love, I learnt the beauty of respect, trust and understanding and making my lady my first priority over my friends.

I became a real man in love so that until she hears the word I love you she would see the name a man who picked up himself, put the toys away and learnt to love, appreciate and share in her failures as well as her success.

When I became a real man in love, I allowed a real lady open up my heart.